What are some funny and smart quotes?

“The human brain can only operate as fast as its slowest brain cells. Too much alcohol kills brain cells, especially the slower, weaker ones. So, regular consumption of beer eliminates the slower brain cells after you’ve had a few beers which will speed up your brain.”

Few people had funnier or smarter quotes than Cliff Clavin from the TV show, Cheers.

“Everyone in the Swiss Army owns a Swiss Army knife. That’s why no one messes with Switzerland.”

Do you anal play alone?

They did a study between postal workers and chimpanze...

“It’s a little known fact that pigs are the smartest animal. Scientists say that if pigs had thumbs and a language that they could be trained to do manual labor. They give you 20 to 30 years of loyal service and then at their retirement dinner, you can eat them.”

“It’s a little known fact that the tan became popular in the Bronze Age.”

WWE Money in the Bank results: Powell's review of John Cena and Logan Paul vs. Jey Uso and Cody Rhodes, two MITB ladder matches, Lyra Valkyria vs. Becky Lynch for the Women's Intercontinental Title - Pro Wrestling Dot Net

My sister Tracy sent me these a little while ago. I thought I’d share them. Thanks Trace.

“Ah just like all women. If they’re not turning down your proposal of marriage, they”re accusing you of suspicious behavior in the lingerie changing room.”

“There is no rule against postal workers dating women. It just works out that way.”

Why are you bare-nakedly displaying your anti-Trump bias while ignoring the liberals' destruction of the US? I am now blocking your e-mails because of your biased articles.

“A Freudian slip is when you say one thing when you’re really thinking about a mother.”